Monday Memo 641: What Are You Wearing Right Now?
It's hard to walk in someone else's expectations, especially when those expectations don't relate to your purpose. You can try to please society, your family, and even your own expectations of what you think you be or do, but eventually you will be dissatisfied and fail. It will deplete your energy and creativity and you will be miserable and only you will know. So what's the answer?
You must resist every attempt when someone, well-meaning or otherwise, tries to get you to fulfill their vision for your life. You must learn to have and pursue your own vision, for it is the only road to happiness and success. One of the road signs for that vision or purpose is the joy or lack of it in your own heart.
That's what David had to do before he was king and it served him well.You may want to read the story to which I am referring in 1 Samuel 17.
TRY THIS ON
The story of David and Goliath is known in many cultures and lands. Every day, Goliath and the armies of Israel would line up across from one another and nothing would happen. One day, David came to check up on his brothers and heard Goliath taunting the armies of Israel. That made David angry and he wondered why no one was doing anything about it.
"When he heard that there was a reward for anyone who would kill Goliath, David immediately volunteered to do the deed.
When David told King Saul that he [David] would be the one to kill Goliath, Saul laughed, dismissing him as too young and inexperienced. David would not relent, however, so Saul eventually gave in and sanctioned the encounter. Before he let David go, he gave him his personal armor to wear:
Then Saul dressed David in his own tunic. He put a coat of armor on him and a bronze helmet on his head. David fastened on his sword over the tunic and tried walking around, because he was not used to them. "I cannot go in these," he said to Saul, "because I am not used to them." So he took them off. Then he took his staff in his hand, chose five smooth stones from the stream, put them in the pouch of his shepherd's bag and, with his sling in his hand, approached the Philistine (1 Samuel 17:38-40).
David couldn't function in Saul's armor because Saul was a head taller than all his peers (see 1 Samuel 9:2). Instead, David took off the armor and took up what he felt most comfortable with—a slingshot and some stones.
WHAT ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW?
Do you see the lesson here? Saul had expectations that David could and should only fight dressed in body armor, so Saul gave him his. Others have tried to give you what fits them and you have tried to walk in it too. It's not possible, however, for you to be a man or woman of purpose and walk in what someone else gives you. You must find your own joy, creativity, and passion.
What's more, you can't explain it to anyone so they can understand. You don't even understand it! You just know what your heart is telling you and that is what you pursue, whether it makes perfect sense or not. Remember what the wisdom writer told us:
Each heart knows its own bitterness, and no one else can share its joy (Proverbs 14:10 emphasis added).
You know how much you love music, art, travel, writing, business, preaching, or medicine. No one knows better than you what is in your heart, no matter how much they love you or wants what's best for you. Only you are equipped to hear and follow your heart. Are you up to the task?
This week it's time to be honest. Are you trying to fulfill someone else's expectations for you? Have you put on someone else's armor? If so, take it off immediately! Don't face your Goliath's this week in someone else's image for you. Face them in your own; that's good enough to get the job done. You will be lighter, nimbler, and happier than you have been in a while, and it will be a significant step to identify and embrace your purpose. As you do, I know you will have a great week!